Boys rule

I am so glad that I have boys. Don't get me wrong, I know having a daughter is great, and I have my fleeting moments of sadness that I'll never get to shop regularly for hair bows and baby dolls and dresses with flowers. But given our circumstances - we only have two and they're nearly 5 years apart - I'm glad they're boys.

I think it's easier for boys to overcome that kind of age gap with similar interests. We've seen this coming on for a while, but Evan and Bennett have bloomed into full blown play buddies. They both love action figures of any kind, they both love animals, and right now, they're both REALLY into Star Wars. So, for example, after school today they spent an hour an a half doing a "Star Wars battle" together until the need to leave for Bennett's karate class broke things up. I didn't interfere, I didn't have to break up any fights. It was all quite peaceful considering that a desperate battle for the galaxy was going on.

Bennett does have to deal with the challenge of an aspie big brother who largely wants to do the exact same battles over and over again (complete with dialogue, etc) and wants to control nearly every aspect of playing together (who gets to be which character, how long it lasts, where everyone is positioned). Very typical of a kid with AS. Not easy to deal with every day when you're a goofball, creative kid who just wants to have fun.

But I'm really proud of both of them. Bennett has learned to challenge and negotiate with Evan and stands up for himself pretty well. Evan is learning that doing things in a different way and letting Bennett make some decisions in the story is actually kind of fun. It's a great social learning experience that I hope both of them can take into their experiences in the world at large.

I've gotten myself shunned from these Star Wars battles - due largely to my constant efforts to have the characters avoid war through rational discussion or kissing - so if a grown up gets roped into their play it's almost always Matt. Then I go up to my calm bedroom, close the door and read until the violence is over. Yep, boys rule.